When is enough?

I'm still so mad, angry and sad.. Idk who to run to. I don't have anyone even though everyone tells me I can always call them and talk to them, that there always there, but I don't feel that comfort to run to them not just comfort but I've always been those types to keep everything to myself the only person I tell everything to is my husband but he's no longer my other half or my best friend.... My heart aches, my head hurts.. Who well catch me if I fall? I sit here every night and cry, I listen to music to try to sooth my soul. How do I deal with all this? Why can't I just walk away and have no regret? I was a strong person, now I'm so weak. What do they have that is so much better then me? Why does it hurt so much...